Friday, October 2, 2009
My biggest dream coming true :)
On Oct. 4th 2009 my biggest dream of studying interior design will be initially acheived :)
More than 10 yrs ago when I was 13 or 14 whenever somebody asked me what would you like to become in the future my answer would be an interior designer!
That was my forever dream. Today after 10 yrs from finishing Tawjihi I'll have the chance of studying ID :D
That takes me back to the yr 1999 my Tawjihi graduation year. It was the year of ants! A famous year when one of our Tawjihi calculus exam questions was about two ants moving in two directions. The solution of this question was Pythagoras theory.
That year I graduated from Tawjihi with a general point average of 84.9. Which was far away from the architecture that I wanted to study; my only way to become an interior designer at that time in Jordan. Where interior design was not a specialty in universities yet!
If you ask me when did all this started I'd say when we were moving from one house to another I used to go to the kitchen design visits with mom and that's when it has all started. Watching the many designs interior designers came up with to design a room of 4x6 m2 was amazing and very much inspiring.
Then I started dreaming as usual and imagining. But because architecture needed a very high GPA I was kind of hoping more than dreaming. Not becuase I was a lousy student, no; I always used to be one of the top students in my class. But because the Tawjihi system was neve fair. When I got 84.9 that was actually very convenient for me because I always wanted to study in Irbid universities. Either Yarmouk or JUST. I was always fond of the idea of independence ! My father was a very protective traditional one and did not allow me to study but in the university of Jordan. Which was a big disappointment to me for two reasons; the first is the independence one and the second more important one is that I could never study architecture with my GPA.
That left only one option to me or to be more accurate two options; the first was to study what my GPA allows me to which was Nutrition, while the second is to study ID or architecture in Irbid universities without my father's acceptance. Since I was still financially dependant on him I had no real choice back then but to study Nutrition which I did.
At the beginning I hated the university of Jordan very much to the point of getting low marks compared to what I'm used to. But then I had to face reality and accept it and that's when I decided to like what I'm studying. Bio and chemistry the major subjects to study in it where my favorites. And life went on till I graduated from uni with a 3.38 as GPA which is reflected as very good in uni terminology.
I decided not to work as a nutritionist because their options sucks; either a dietition in gyms or a dietion in hospitals. I decided to become a teacher instead! That was a nice choice because I managed to work as a KG teacher in two schools. The first one was more enjoyable than the second because it used teaching through playing and creative ways of teaching kids. Then I was offered an opportunity to work in HR in Fastlink (a telecom company on Jordan). Which I grew in to become an HR Sr. officer then I was offered another good opportunity as an HR team leader in eSense (a software company).
When I became an HR team leader I decided I don't want to keep working in HR for the rest of my life. That's when I decided to view my other options. And that's when the ID thing came back to my mind. And that's when I decided to re study another bachelor's degree in ID :)
That was my most sensical decision and my wildest dream coming true. I started looking in universities and I registered in one of the good ones that is known to most Jordanians ; Al Ahliyeh university.
My first studying day will be Oct, 4th 2009. A historical day in my life at least :)
I want to mention here that my friends supported me a lot. Especially my dearest REEM Al Qaisi and NEMATI Al Alami :) and my friends at eSense also supported the idea a lot especially Rawan R, Rasha I, Areej KH, while the rest of my friends at eSense were really happy for me. My Old friends from Fastlink were also happy for me. While my friend Jumana Bader was proud of me :) My family on the other hand resisted as usual my decisions. Mom, my beloved mom, thought that I'm settled down in what I do and I'm paid well so why would I change, my father thought that I should continue studying a Master's in nutrition or in something else, while my dear brother Abu 7meid was surprised and still until this very moment thinks that I'll try ID for a semester then stop.
What my family does not know that I'll never give up my dream no matter how old I became or what happens in the middle of my studying path, inshalla I'll continue till the end because a one whose been dreaming for something for the past 10 yrs would simply never let it go when she finds it.
There are nice details to this story like my self-belief that was reinforced by "Tafa2alu bil 5eir tajiduh" which came in the form of THE SECRET. Or like my work arrangements that were really flexible because of my direct manager at eSense who made it easier for me to continue ID.
And I'm sure that the list will grow longer through my enjoyable journey of studying ID :)
More than 10 yrs ago when I was 13 or 14 whenever somebody asked me what would you like to become in the future my answer would be an interior designer!
That was my forever dream. Today after 10 yrs from finishing Tawjihi I'll have the chance of studying ID :D
That takes me back to the yr 1999 my Tawjihi graduation year. It was the year of ants! A famous year when one of our Tawjihi calculus exam questions was about two ants moving in two directions. The solution of this question was Pythagoras theory.
That year I graduated from Tawjihi with a general point average of 84.9. Which was far away from the architecture that I wanted to study; my only way to become an interior designer at that time in Jordan. Where interior design was not a specialty in universities yet!
If you ask me when did all this started I'd say when we were moving from one house to another I used to go to the kitchen design visits with mom and that's when it has all started. Watching the many designs interior designers came up with to design a room of 4x6 m2 was amazing and very much inspiring.
Then I started dreaming as usual and imagining. But because architecture needed a very high GPA I was kind of hoping more than dreaming. Not becuase I was a lousy student, no; I always used to be one of the top students in my class. But because the Tawjihi system was neve fair. When I got 84.9 that was actually very convenient for me because I always wanted to study in Irbid universities. Either Yarmouk or JUST. I was always fond of the idea of independence ! My father was a very protective traditional one and did not allow me to study but in the university of Jordan. Which was a big disappointment to me for two reasons; the first is the independence one and the second more important one is that I could never study architecture with my GPA.
That left only one option to me or to be more accurate two options; the first was to study what my GPA allows me to which was Nutrition, while the second is to study ID or architecture in Irbid universities without my father's acceptance. Since I was still financially dependant on him I had no real choice back then but to study Nutrition which I did.
At the beginning I hated the university of Jordan very much to the point of getting low marks compared to what I'm used to. But then I had to face reality and accept it and that's when I decided to like what I'm studying. Bio and chemistry the major subjects to study in it where my favorites. And life went on till I graduated from uni with a 3.38 as GPA which is reflected as very good in uni terminology.
I decided not to work as a nutritionist because their options sucks; either a dietition in gyms or a dietion in hospitals. I decided to become a teacher instead! That was a nice choice because I managed to work as a KG teacher in two schools. The first one was more enjoyable than the second because it used teaching through playing and creative ways of teaching kids. Then I was offered an opportunity to work in HR in Fastlink (a telecom company on Jordan). Which I grew in to become an HR Sr. officer then I was offered another good opportunity as an HR team leader in eSense (a software company).
When I became an HR team leader I decided I don't want to keep working in HR for the rest of my life. That's when I decided to view my other options. And that's when the ID thing came back to my mind. And that's when I decided to re study another bachelor's degree in ID :)
That was my most sensical decision and my wildest dream coming true. I started looking in universities and I registered in one of the good ones that is known to most Jordanians ; Al Ahliyeh university.
My first studying day will be Oct, 4th 2009. A historical day in my life at least :)
I want to mention here that my friends supported me a lot. Especially my dearest REEM Al Qaisi and NEMATI Al Alami :) and my friends at eSense also supported the idea a lot especially Rawan R, Rasha I, Areej KH, while the rest of my friends at eSense were really happy for me. My Old friends from Fastlink were also happy for me. While my friend Jumana Bader was proud of me :) My family on the other hand resisted as usual my decisions. Mom, my beloved mom, thought that I'm settled down in what I do and I'm paid well so why would I change, my father thought that I should continue studying a Master's in nutrition or in something else, while my dear brother Abu 7meid was surprised and still until this very moment thinks that I'll try ID for a semester then stop.
What my family does not know that I'll never give up my dream no matter how old I became or what happens in the middle of my studying path, inshalla I'll continue till the end because a one whose been dreaming for something for the past 10 yrs would simply never let it go when she finds it.
There are nice details to this story like my self-belief that was reinforced by "Tafa2alu bil 5eir tajiduh" which came in the form of THE SECRET. Or like my work arrangements that were really flexible because of my direct manager at eSense who made it easier for me to continue ID.
And I'm sure that the list will grow longer through my enjoyable journey of studying ID :)
Sunday, September 20, 2009
The old man
Today is Sep, 20th 2009 the first day of Al Fiter Eid in 2009 , we , my family and I, were celebrating the first day of Eid as usual having lunch out. Correction! we were having lunch out in a restaurant unlike other Eids which we usually celebrate with our relatives and more specifically my relatives to mom.
But counting maybe five years back suddenly Jordanian people are tolerating no local traditional celebrations in Eid. No, instead they prefer to travel some place where they can enjoy the luxury of seeing no relatives in Eid which they usually do all year long!
This year unfortunately was no exception than the past five years and most of our relatives just like other Jordanians are abroad ! And we had to dine in a restaurant.
We chose macaroni's my mom's favorite, we went there and it was nice, the food was good , the company as well.
By the time we were finishing our main dish a group of people, a family, entered the place. They were all females except for a young guy and an old man. A very old man maybe in his mid eighties.
I watched as they entered and when the old man came led by his grand daughter, I assume. They offered him a seat next to his elder daughter ,I guess, and their maid.
He was afraid , at least that's what his body language was saying, his shoulders were up a little and he resisted to enter at the beginning but his grand daughter almost forced him to.
He looked like a three years old boy who is not used to seeing strangers; not feeling comfortable in this crowd.
He sat their although with nearly 7 other people he was alone! He started taking small sips of his water, really small that after sipping for the fourth time his glass was still filled.
He wore one of those old hats , leather hats, that look like caps; caps for old men like himself. He was wearing a tweed jacket , grey ,I guess, finely tiled, over a white shirt and ,I think, a black trouser.
His hair was completely white and he wore eyes glasses , rounded shaped eyes glasses, old fashioned as well.
He reminded me of my grandfather ,allah yir7amo, with his slow movements and his charisma about him.
This old man was just like any other man of his age fed up with life and a little bit ashamed! Ashamed of his old age and the disturbance he was causing to his family.
"You are disturbing no one old man" I was thinking, they must be so proud to have you around them, with all this history of life! Simply, living a life is history and an achievement by itself.
He touched my heart with his counted movements trying to annoy no one yet tense and trying to overcome his tension by continuously sipping tiny sips of water.
"His memory sure has weakened" I thought, maybe he forgot that he already sipped and probably he is not aware of the people who are sitting around him leaving him feeling so alone.
Probably he remembers his daughters only while his grand daughters and the only grand son he has he probably does not remember.
Memory is such a weird thing at his age; it brings very old silly things most likely from childhood and deletes very fresh important other things like having grand daughters or even a grand son!
I know that because I used to sit a lot with my grand father who used to tell me lots of stories about his childhood while he always used to forget who I am!
He once told me a story about when his friends convinced him to try out a cigarette and he finally lost the battle and tried one. The details he mentioned were amazing; هدا كان عنا محل بنبيع قضامة و ملبس يا سيدو بيافا و كنت دايما اقعد فيه بساعد ابوي و مرة اقنعوني الشباب ادخن سيكارة و اخدت بس شفطة و حدة و قعدت اكح بعدها بيجي نص ساعة
Always teaching lessons with these little stories and right after this my grand mother would ask him do you know who you are talking to and he'd remain silent for a while then he'd say bint .... flan aw 3illan. Now, what's really weird is that he remembered my father's name and not my mother's name; his daughter!
Going back to the old man, one time he sipped water and the maid wiped his mouth with a tissue, she wiped his mouth like a mom who's yelling to her son never to do something again!
He looked at her and moved his hand slowly, I think he wanted to remove her hand away but hers was faster than his. I think the old man was annoyed with the maid. I mean a maid! really after all these years a strange young maid would wipe his mouth clean teaching him ,the old man with his 85 years, not to spell water!
This old man is supposed to sit there proud and loving enjoying the rest of his life with his family instead of being taught by a maid!
When this happened I wondered again if this man is aware who is sitting next to him. "Probably he mixed the maid with one of his daughters" I thought. But he proved me wrong by leaning to his real daughter telling her something.
I spent my time watching this scene taking in as much details as I could. I saw how his family were not talking to him or ignoring his great presence to my surprise!
Instead of enjoying every single moment with such a man they were actually ignoring his presence!!!
The man continued sipping and I continued watching then we had to leave. I chose to pass in front of him to watch the very last details of this strange encounter and I noticed his non -focusing eyes. They were still; not wandering as eyes usually do. As if lost in his own thoughts. The color of his eyes was once brown but the old age made them grayish brown. It's brown sure faded with time just as everything else does.
That was another scene that touched me and I felt I wanted very much to talk about.
But counting maybe five years back suddenly Jordanian people are tolerating no local traditional celebrations in Eid. No, instead they prefer to travel some place where they can enjoy the luxury of seeing no relatives in Eid which they usually do all year long!
This year unfortunately was no exception than the past five years and most of our relatives just like other Jordanians are abroad ! And we had to dine in a restaurant.
We chose macaroni's my mom's favorite, we went there and it was nice, the food was good , the company as well.
By the time we were finishing our main dish a group of people, a family, entered the place. They were all females except for a young guy and an old man. A very old man maybe in his mid eighties.
I watched as they entered and when the old man came led by his grand daughter, I assume. They offered him a seat next to his elder daughter ,I guess, and their maid.
He was afraid , at least that's what his body language was saying, his shoulders were up a little and he resisted to enter at the beginning but his grand daughter almost forced him to.
He looked like a three years old boy who is not used to seeing strangers; not feeling comfortable in this crowd.
He sat their although with nearly 7 other people he was alone! He started taking small sips of his water, really small that after sipping for the fourth time his glass was still filled.
He wore one of those old hats , leather hats, that look like caps; caps for old men like himself. He was wearing a tweed jacket , grey ,I guess, finely tiled, over a white shirt and ,I think, a black trouser.
His hair was completely white and he wore eyes glasses , rounded shaped eyes glasses, old fashioned as well.
He reminded me of my grandfather ,allah yir7amo, with his slow movements and his charisma about him.
This old man was just like any other man of his age fed up with life and a little bit ashamed! Ashamed of his old age and the disturbance he was causing to his family.
"You are disturbing no one old man" I was thinking, they must be so proud to have you around them, with all this history of life! Simply, living a life is history and an achievement by itself.
He touched my heart with his counted movements trying to annoy no one yet tense and trying to overcome his tension by continuously sipping tiny sips of water.
"His memory sure has weakened" I thought, maybe he forgot that he already sipped and probably he is not aware of the people who are sitting around him leaving him feeling so alone.
Probably he remembers his daughters only while his grand daughters and the only grand son he has he probably does not remember.
Memory is such a weird thing at his age; it brings very old silly things most likely from childhood and deletes very fresh important other things like having grand daughters or even a grand son!
I know that because I used to sit a lot with my grand father who used to tell me lots of stories about his childhood while he always used to forget who I am!
He once told me a story about when his friends convinced him to try out a cigarette and he finally lost the battle and tried one. The details he mentioned were amazing; هدا كان عنا محل بنبيع قضامة و ملبس يا سيدو بيافا و كنت دايما اقعد فيه بساعد ابوي و مرة اقنعوني الشباب ادخن سيكارة و اخدت بس شفطة و حدة و قعدت اكح بعدها بيجي نص ساعة
Always teaching lessons with these little stories and right after this my grand mother would ask him do you know who you are talking to and he'd remain silent for a while then he'd say bint .... flan aw 3illan. Now, what's really weird is that he remembered my father's name and not my mother's name; his daughter!
Going back to the old man, one time he sipped water and the maid wiped his mouth with a tissue, she wiped his mouth like a mom who's yelling to her son never to do something again!
He looked at her and moved his hand slowly, I think he wanted to remove her hand away but hers was faster than his. I think the old man was annoyed with the maid. I mean a maid! really after all these years a strange young maid would wipe his mouth clean teaching him ,the old man with his 85 years, not to spell water!
This old man is supposed to sit there proud and loving enjoying the rest of his life with his family instead of being taught by a maid!
When this happened I wondered again if this man is aware who is sitting next to him. "Probably he mixed the maid with one of his daughters" I thought. But he proved me wrong by leaning to his real daughter telling her something.
I spent my time watching this scene taking in as much details as I could. I saw how his family were not talking to him or ignoring his great presence to my surprise!
Instead of enjoying every single moment with such a man they were actually ignoring his presence!!!
The man continued sipping and I continued watching then we had to leave. I chose to pass in front of him to watch the very last details of this strange encounter and I noticed his non -focusing eyes. They were still; not wandering as eyes usually do. As if lost in his own thoughts. The color of his eyes was once brown but the old age made them grayish brown. It's brown sure faded with time just as everything else does.
That was another scene that touched me and I felt I wanted very much to talk about.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)